The parsha this week is Behaalotekha. My Aliyah takes place in Hazeroth.

Miriam and Aaron are gossiping about Moshe, which is not the usual characteristic of either of them. G-d gets mad and everything goes downhill from there.

For my divar Torah, I would like to focus your attention to Aaron. Aaron is Moshe’s brother, who eventually becomes High Priest. Aside from that, he is loving and caring which is why in a rabbinic work called the “Pirkei Avot” it says, “You should be like Aaron pursuing and working for peace and loving all human beings.” This is why in the Jewish Tradition Aaron is seen as a peacemaker among all people.

Now why would someone like that gossip? I believe that the answer can be found in the story of the golden calf. Aaron wants everyone to be happy.

However, this is not always possible… as shown in this story and the story of the golden calf.

Let’s think back to the golden calf incident. After Moshe has been on Mount Sinai for about 40 days the people start to lose faith. They go to Aaron and ask him to make them a god to guide them because they don’t know what has happened to Moshe. They ask for this because they think that without Moshe they are cut off from G-d. Aaron builds the golden calf to calm them down because they believe it will connect them to G-d just as Moshe had done before. And Aaron would not have done this if the people hadn’t ganged up on him and pressured him into doing so.

All this also connects to the kind of person Aaron was because he loves everyone – and the golden calf can be seen just as a gesture to appease people. I believe I very much relate to Aaron because both of us are always trying to please everyone and in doing so we hurt ourselves.

Now back to this Parsha. I think it is possible to explain why Aaron listens to Miriam gossip and doesn’t say anything to stop her. Sometimes we think just listening to gossip is fine, but that is incorrect.

In Hebrew school I learned that gossiping hurts three people, the gossiper, the listener and the one who they gossip about. The one who is gossiped about- because it makes them feel that the people talking about them don’t like them and or what they are saying might be true.

The one who listens - because it changes their view about the one who is gossiped about.

And the person who gossips - because it changes the way they look at the world. If someone gossips a lot they tend to only see flaws in people. That’s one of the reasons gossiping is bad, but another reason is that you can never undo gossip.

The Hasidic tradition gives us a wonderful story to illustrate this point. There is this man and he is always spreading rumors and gossiping about the Rabbi. And one day the man feels bad about what he did, so he goes to the Rabbi and tells him that he is the one who has been gossiping about him. He asks the Rabbi: Is there any way that you can forgive me?

And the rabbi says: Yes, but first there is something that you must do for me. I want you to take a feather pillow onto the top of the roof of the synagogue and shake out all the feathers and then come back to me. The gossiper does that and then goes back to the Rabbi and says: Now can you forgive me? The Rabbi says: There is just one more thing I need you to do for me. Go back and pick up every one of the feathers and put them back in the pillow. When you are done then I will be able to forgive you.

But that is impossible!! says the man. The wind has taken the feathers and blown them all over the village and the surrounding area and there is no way that I can get all of them back. The Rabbi says to him: it is just the same with the rumors that you spread about me. There is no way for you to take them back.

And now we can see why gossiping is bad and why Miriam gets punished. Her punishment is being given leprosy and the fact that G-d will not heal her for seven days, even though Moshe himself asks G-d to.

In this story it seems Miriam gests punished and Aaron doesn’t, but in fact he does – because he is the one who has to declare his sister unfit to be in the camp, and the one who has to send his beloved sister out of the camp for a week. As you can see, Aaron also gets hurt in this story, though it is not as clear.

In conclusion I can see where Aaron is coming from and how he must feel when listening to Miriam gossip. It is hard to listen to someone you like speak badly about someone else you like because there is no way to do so without hurting anyone’s feelings, especially your own.

Finally I would like to thank everyone who helped me with getting ready for my bar-mitzvah. I would like to thank Rabbi Nelly for teaching me everything I needed to know, I would like to thank Charlie Cahn for working with me every night and teaching me the prayers, I would like to thank my dad for helping me with my divar torah, I would like to thank my mom for making kippot and cooking along with Pam Lampell, Alice Cahn, Susan Tritter, Asya Takken, Pat Goldman, Jerry Quinn, The Internet Jewish Quilters, and my mom’s friend Rob who came all the way from Alaska. And speaking of coming all the way from other places, I would like to thank all of you for coming out here today.

Shabbat Shalom.